Jean [Prior] had started the meeting for me. I got dressed up in my
Colonel outfit (British army jacket, black pants, leather shoes, hat
and riding whip), and we entered the classroom. Somebody had gotten
them all stirred up... When we finally got them quieted a bit, I started
them clapping in rhythm. "Pretend there's real music," I
said. A mistake. Someone started humming an indiscernible melody.
"Stop that," I called. "You're too silly." And
I gave my backup singers the cue to start doing the arm moves.
into the rap, with the aid of my trusty lyrics sheet. (I've learned
far too often that it's best not to try to go from memory with the
songs I write, especially if I've written them the same day that I'm
performing them!) Since the same guy who'd been humming was still
being a bit loud into the piece, I directed one of the lines in the
first verse to him, "If I were you, I wouldn't take a chance
/ If you do something silly, I'll kick you in the pants." That
shut him up.
the chorus, I danced a little across the stage, using my riding whip
as a "cane" and shuffling in "Hammer"-like moves.
People seemed to appreciate it. They laughed, anyway. Of course, they
could have been laughing at my background singers/dancers, who may
very well have been upstaging me the entire time.
end of the song, I went up to Andy (all of them were still dancing)
and pointed my riding whip at him. "You're not even a proper
woman! Get off!" I directed him off stage. He looked like an
accused, frightened puppy (something he does very well), whimpered
and ran off.
I attacked Carl. "What is this?" I asked, pointing to his
T-shirt. "Powdermilk Biscuits? That's not even a real product.
Off with you!!" Carl exited, stage right.
was still on stage. I went up to her and started talking. "I
mean, nobody enjoys a good joke more than I do. Well, maybe my spouse
and a few of my friends. But there's no harm in that! I mean... everything's
just too bloody silly."
gave a disgusted look at me and in an aside to the audience, commented,
"That's it. I'm leaving.
They don't pay me enough." She huffed off the stage.
said a line!" I exclaimed. "Now we'll have to pay her more!"
This caused a minor uproar in the audience, as people offered to do
various OTHER things for money. I looked around, as if just realizing
that I was alone. "Am I alone up here? That's not very silly."
And I walked offstage.
the reaction we got, it seems that the club enjoyed my little skit.
We also had a running joke through the meeting, as people jumped up
and said, "This is my only line!" and then someone else
chirped in, "Oh, now we'll have to pay you!" People would
jump up in the middle of other people's skits and say, "At this
point, I would like to do a cartwheel for money." Then they'd
get pushed off the stage.
in the meeting, I tried to get people to dance every time they got
up to say something, but that died pretty quick. However, since I'd
brought my CD player and my new Monty Python Sings CD, we listened
and sang along to several tunes. Then we watched, I believe, an episode
of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.