This weekend, my husband, The Gryphon, and I attended Philcon as panelists.

On Saturday, the second and longest irly early and dropped our doggie, Una, at the pet sitter's before getting breakfast.

We arrived in plenty of time for my first panel, "Vs." This is where the audience gives the panel suggestions for pairings of either fictional or real people (or non-people) who would battle it out. The panel makes arguments for who would win.

Frank was the last one to arrive, after we'd already done our mic checks. As he walked up the aisle, I told him that he'd scared the living daylights out of me the other day by rushing into a panel with his light saber. He sat down next to me, and his wife, Brianna, ran up at the beginning of the panel and battled him. This time, she had a foam sword and he had a Nerf gun.

The Horror Film Buff was supposed to be the moderator, but Frank took over. It was his idea to come up with brackets, so that we could have a tournament. Some suggestions came from the panel members and some from the audience. As each pairing was announced, we'd argue on who should win. They were as follows:

Reagan versus Gorbachev: Based on the scar on Gorbie's forehead, we reasoned that he was Harry Potter in disguise and Reagan was really Voldemort. Therefore, Gorbie wins.

Bob Barker versus William Shatner: Despite his age, Bob Barker is resourceful. He could use his various props from The Price is Right as weapons. Also, the animals would fight on his side. Bob Barker wins.

Picard versus Kirk: Though it might seem a fairly even battle, Kirk would stun Picard with his bad acting and then knock him down. Kirk wins.

Greedo versus Han Solo: It doesn't matter who shot first. Han Solo wins. I argued for the cantina musicians, whom no one is watching and therefore would have the jump on both.

Roger Moore's James Bond versus Sean Connery's James Bond: Sean Connery wins primarily based on the coolness factor. After all, he can unzip a wet suit and have a dry suit underneath.

Angelina Jolie versus Jennifer Aniston: Not only can Angelina Jolie handle weapons (or at least prop ones), but her lips could be used as a weapon. Angelina wins.

Jeannie of I Dream of Jeannie versus Samantha Stevens of Bewitched: By the time Jeannie would have finished putting her arms together and nodding her head, Samantha would have already twitched her nose and sent her packing. Samantha wins.

Dick York's Darin from Bewitched versus Dick Sargent's Darin: Since Dick York had a bad back, which caused him to lead the show, Dick Sargent would clearly win.

Pikachu of Pokemon versus Stitch of Lilo & Stitch: Pikachu's only defense is to say his own name and jolt people. Stitch eats nails. He could swallow Pikachu, and then burp electric clouds. Plus, Disney always wins. Match goes to Stitch.

Lestat of Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles versus Edward of the Twilight series: At this point, the "voice of God," i.e. the sound tech, spoke into his mic and said, "Vampires do not sparkle." They do not. Lestat wins.

All of the Kzinti from the Kzinti Wars series versus Aslan of the Narnia series: Even with the Kzinti combining forces, they could not win against the combined forces of magical creatures and humans fighting on behalf of Aslan. Plus, if you kill Aslan, he just comes back. Aslan wins.

ROUND TWO

Lestat versus Gorbachev: Since Gorbie is, of course, STILL Harry Potter, he would win. Plus, he has nukes.

Bob Barker versus Han Solo: Bob Barker still has all the animals on his side, whereas Han Solo only has Chewbacca. Bob Barker wins.

Angelina Jolie versus Aslan: Angelina would cut Aslan in half with her lips and bury the halves in separte areas so that Aslan cannot regenerate. Angelina wins.

Samantha Stevens versus Stitch: Since she's used to magical things going awry, Stitch's antics would not upset her. Plus, if she needs help, she has her witchy mother, whereas Stitch only has Lilo. Samantha wins.

Dick Sargent versus Kirk: It doesn't even matter which Kirk he's fighting, Dick Sargent would lose to any of them. Kirk wins.

Sean Connery's Bond versus new challenger Batman of the 1940s comics: Although they both have really cool toys, Batman also has a suit. Batman wins.

ROUND THREE

Gorbachev versus Kirk: Even though Gorbie is both Harry Potter and has nukes, Kirk has Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry and a ship that can blow up an entire planet. Kirk wins.

Batman versus Angelina Jolie: Batman's utility belt is no match for Angelina's lips. Angelina wins.

Samantha Stevens versus Bob Barker: Bob Barker has the animals, plus he also has millions of fans. Samantha just has wimpy Darin and her mercurial mother. Bob Barker is also cooler. Bob Barker wins.

FINAL ROUND

Kirk versus Angelina Jolie versus Bob Barker: At this point, one of the audience members informed us that Bob Barker a black belt in karate, tipping the match in his favor. Kirk and Angelina would distract each other by going off in the bushes together, and Bob Barker would drop a toaster on them.

BOB BARKER WINS!

For the rest of the day, whenever I saw anybody I knew, I'd ask them, "Guess who won 'Vs.' Bob Barker!" The look of surprise on their face was wonderful.

Every time I passed a fellow "Vs." panelist, we'd say, "Bob Barker. How did we let that happen?"

Next, The Gryphon wanted to go to The Cheshire Cat's panel:

We walked in a little late, because the previous panel hadn't ended until the very last minute. I don't think we missed much beyond the introductions, though.

Cory Doctorow suggested that "We're already there." He explained that if you view evolution not just as adaptation to circumstance but as a progress to perfection, singularities are just a reflection of that progress.

Bud Sparhawk and David Louis Edelman agreed that the march of scientific progress has been accelerating, leading to some authors being incapable even now of keeping ahead of the latest developments. Sparhawk added that, really, SF is generally not predictive anyway but rather, cautionary. He also pointed to the new dialogue of how we explain ourselves to each other (such as Facebook and Twitter).

The Cheshire Cat observed that we've switched from the physics age, the biologic age to the information age, and nowadays, it's harder to predict what's beyond the standard model, because the speed of change is faster.

They discussed the function of technology in SF. Doctorow said that cyberpunks used computers for their god-like qualities because the audience didn't know much about them. The Cheshire Cat suggested that the construct of the singularity is about playing with the idea of what would happen in such an instance. "How do humans relate to something bigger than them: God, a singula4rity, society, the company they work for."

Edelman noted that stories about technology are always really stories about humans, where the technology is a tool for exploring aspects of human nature. To this, Tom Purdom added that if you transform characters too far beyond human traits they become unrecognizable, and it's harder for the audience to care.

Besides, Edelman said, "Predicting the future past five to 10 years is really just a fetish." In other words, it's nigh impossible; just a theoretical game.

Doctorow summed it up nicely: "The future composts the past. There is no tabula rasa." He said that sometimes SF writers want to do that, to imagine that part of the present no longer applies. For those purposes, invoking the singularity can help. He continued, "Do we really have to drag the past around with us like a suitcase full of junk we're not going to look at again?" The answer? According to Doctorow, yes.

Ultimately, it was a very enlightening discussion, even for us non-scientists in the audience.

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Afterwards, The Gryphon and I joined The Cheshire Cat for lunch in the hotel restaurant. I had a tuna salad wrap with a side salad instead of French fries. We told The Cheshire Cat he'd held his own on the panel, and it had been a great discussion.

I looked through the schedule and asked if they wanted to go to the Dr. Horrible singalong, but neither of them were really interested. Instead, we took a walk through the Dealer's Room.

Right inside the door was a table full of games, so naturally, we had to stop and look. That vendor also had a chest filled with plushies. Looking through them, I found plushies designed to look like various microbes. I found it amusing to pull them out of the chest and say, "Should we get hepatitis for the baby? Should we give the baby rabies? Do you want to give the baby E. coli?"

Ultimately, we decided on the common cold, in part because it's an octagonal plushie with eyes on it. Once the baby is past the stage of just drooling on toys or putting them in his or her mouth, it could be used as a ball.

We also picked up Monty Python Flux, a game I'd been wanting since finding out about it earlier this year.

The other tables included many book sellers, including some authors selling their own works; clothing booths (kimonos, corsets and T-shirts); jewelry; elven costume accessories; artwork; and some music. I also got some handmade Christmas cards from one of the artists, which feature snowmen as comic book heroes, with amusing sayings.

I accompanied The Cheshire Cat to his next panel:

I warned The Cheshire Cat I would have to leave early in order to get to the key note presentation a little early. Plus, I had to run out to my car first and pick up some things.

They started by speaking about the interesting social constructs that appeared in older SF movies, such as, Kimberly Ann Kindya pointed out, the fact that people used to smoke on spaceships!

The Cheshire Cat noted that SF is worse at predicting technology than social changes. And to this, Walter Hunt added that sometimes they resist showing social changes simply because people like to imagine that things will stay the same, regardless of the advancements of technology. The second wave of SF, Kindya said, has shown more social changes.

Michael Ventrella added that it's not just SF writers; lots of genres have trouble predicting the future. Hunt observed that the Cold War writers imagined the Cold War would go on perpetually or end in a calamity.

As I had to leave, the panel was just getting to some changes that were not anticipated, such as Kindya pointing out that there is no Big Brother. Instead, people are voluntarily making their private lives public through forums such as blogs, Facebook and Twitter.

I wish I could have stayed longer, but I needed to go, so I quietly slipped out.

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From the social change panel, I made for the hotel's concession area, to buy a snack to have in my bag, should I need it. The plan was to then grab my complete works of Edgar Allan Poe from the car and make it to the ballroom for the key note presentation in time to arrange an interview with Catherine Asaro for Sunday.

Now, as fate would have it, I hadn't even made the snack panel when I ran into Onezumi Hartstein and talked to her for a while. That did turn out to be our longest conversation at the con, though, so I'm glad I stopped.

By the time I'd bought a snack and grabbed my book from the car, I arrived only about five minutes early. Asaro was nowhere to be seen, so I asked a guy near the door, and he said that she'd gone back to her room to get something. The problem was that I knew I'd have to leave early for my own panel, so I'd been hoping to arrange the interview before her keynote presentation started. She and her keyboard accompanist, Donald Wolcott, however, breezed in and marched straight up to the stage.

Fortunately, she gave people the opportunity to bring up pictures of her, if they had them, to get them signed. I'd received one from her the day before, so I brought it up on the stage and, when she went to sign it, I told her quickly that I wouldn't be able to stay until the end and I was hoping to meet with her tomorrow morning or afternoon. She said that she'd be free after her 3 p.m. reading, so I arranged to meet her in that room after it ended.

In a somewhat nontraditional format, rather than giving a speech, Asaro and Wolcott were instead interviewed by Oz Fontecchio, a former Philcon president and the moderator of "The Eye of Argon" reading which I'd attended the night before.

Here are some highlights:

Wolcott's musical interest started with a Christmas gift at age 5. Since then, he's learned classical piano, has performed in a jazz ensemble, taught himself bass, guitar and drums, earned multiple awards in college and is an in-demand performaner in Washington, D.C., and Maryland.

Asaro started out her career as a ballet dancer but fell in love with science and physics in college, eventually earning a Ph.D. in physics and continuing to write scholarly papers alongside her fiction works. She observed that ballet dancers are often good at match, and she theorizes it's because ballet relies on patterns, repetition and algorhythms.

She began writing in grad school and delayed her doctorate by six months to finish some writing projects. "If you're a writer, you have to write," she said.

About her tendency to mix genres, such as hard science with romance, she said, "No one told me you can't do this, so I did it." Her first book, she said, was like Romeo and Juliet in space with some military SF thrown in.

She said that the two genres do have something in common: a scientific SF story usually revolves around a problem that has to be solved. In some ways, romance is the same way, except that the problem to be solved is the relationship.

From an early age, she enjoyed reading SF but felt there needed to be more females in it. Hence, when she began to write her own works, she did so. She admits, though, that making them strong female characters was not deliberate. "I wrote what I liked."

About her latest project, a musical CD/book combination, Diamond Star, she said the book came first, but she discovered that in order to write it she found herself needing to write lyrics. And in order to write lyrics that made sense, she wanted to write music. So she connected with the front man of Point Valid, who was really interested in the project, and he helped her write the songs.

However, when it came time to promote the book, the lead singer of Point Valid was overseas in Israel, so she placed a Craig's List ad and found Donald Wolcott to accompany her to her public appearances. Asaro has also been studying with a voice coach.

She and Wolcott are currently working on another CD, and she also mentioned the idea of doing a CD based on a new paranormal romance novel. That was all she could say at this point, she asserted.

About then, I had to leave in order to be early for my own panel, on the poetry of Edgar Allan Poe.

(to be continued tomorrow)