Musings
an Online Journal of Sorts
By Alyce Wilson
A day in the exciting life of a freelance writer/editor.
7:45: Wake up from peaceful dreams. Sky is too gray. Go back to sleep.
7:55: Wake up from dream about gray sky. Look at clock. It's only been 10 minutes?
8:05: Wake up to sound of next-door neighbor's dog crying. Must be 8 o'clock. Get up.
8:06: Look out window; too gray and rainy for a dog walk. Let dog out into yard.
8:10: Do eight-minute abs tape. As always, grunt ironically at the part where the instructor says, "This is fun!"
8:18: Do kickboxing aerobics tape. My dog takes this as her cue to eat. She takes one piece at a time from her bowl and walks across the room to sit in front of the TV, where she eats it. The challenge is timing the kicks to avoid her. She finds this amusing.
8:20: Only 20 minutes left of the tape... Ideas start circulating, projects unfinished, promises made. Make mental note to get working on these various ideas today.
8:40: Realize that yesterday I skipped my Pilates/Yoga workout. Decide to get it over with now so I don't skip it again today.
8:43: More ideas pop up. Notice that the cactus, which previously seemed to need water, is now dead. Feel guilty.
9:05: Done with the Pilates/Yoga workout. Feeling "supple and elongated," fresh and peaceful. Hop in the shower.
9:07: Think of more projects that need to be started. Resolve to create a "To Do" list in order to organize projects better.
9:15: Dry hair. The mousse is almost all gone. The stuff at the bottom is liquid, not fluffy. Use it anyway.
9:20: The overhead ceiling fan light blows.
9:25: Realize I'm almost out of breakfast stuff. Decide to go shopping.
9:26: Freezing rain starts. The screen door to the abandoned house next door starts slamming in the wind. The snow I piled in front of the door during the blizzard must have melted.
9:30: My dog barks excitedly as I put my shoes on. She knows putting shoes on means I'm going somewhere. She assumes she's coming with me. She whines in frustration as I close the door behind me.
9:35: Decide the freezing rain's not bad enough to prevent a quick trip to the store. Find a rock and put it in front of the screen door on the abandoned house. That should do it.
9:50: Arrive at K-Mart. Find the lightbulbs. Decide to get breakfast items there and save a trip to the grocery store. Think about all the projects I should be starting. Buy a cute little pull-chain extender with a clear plastic dolphin on it, so I don't have to keep tying strings to the ceiling fan pull-chain.
10:05: Arriving home, see that the screen door blew open again, pushing the rock out of the way. Find a larger rock.
10:10: Install light bulb. Putting the bulbs away in the closet, realize there was already an extra ceiling bulb in there. Install dolphin pull chain; it looks pretty. Turn fan off and on several times, enjoying the new purchase (what am I, a Sim?)
10:15: Fire up computer. Fire up AIM (AOL Instant Mire). This is how my editor communicates with me. Pray that nothing comes up until I get a chance to start some of my projects.
10: 16: Begin checking e-mail. Reply to friends, check out latest film at Atom Films, renew membership at Bowienet, write several e-mail messages to friends.
12:00: It's NOON? Better start on those projects.
12:01: Receive first IM from editor for the day. Here we go... Arrange work schedule for the evening.
12:06: Look at all the yellow stickies stuck to my computer screen. Get depressed.
12:08: Receive call from freelancer friend; complain about cabin fever and the sad state of the American job world.
12:31: Get into pointless conversation with editor about who would win a cage battle: MSNBC's Lester Holt or CNN's Leon Harris. My editor says "Leon the lion." I say Lester. He's got the height advantage.
12:35: Receive IM from another editor, who wants my feedback on changing work procedures. Provide said feedback.
12:36: Let the dog out again.
12:37:Play "fetch" with the dog. Her way of playing fetch is to take the toy and run into the bedroom onto the bed. I'm supposed to wrestle the toy away from her and throw it. Then she takes the toy into the bedroom again. I suppose this violates the rules of fetch, but she's cute so I let her get away with it.
12:40: Begin working on online journal. Have no ideas for what to do today. Decide to write about my day, just so everyone realizes why I don't normally do this.
1:15: My editor agrees that CNN's James Carville would win a cage battle with FOX's Bill O'Reilly. He's got that "Georgia Deliverance thing going," my editor says. I just believe that bald guys should always win cage battles.
1:25: Check mail. Receive: grocery store flyer, contributor's copy of the business journal for which I write, letter from Verizon asking me to try their DSL service. Nope, too late! I just switched to a cable modem through RCN.
2:30: Realize I'm only up to 2:30 p.m. so far and most readers probably bailed out at 9:26. Decide to make the rest of the day up.
3:00: Receive call from the Pope. He wants to know why I won't return his calls. I remind him I'm not Catholic.
3:15: Discover a rare Picasso sketch in my basement. Realize it's just the same 20-year-old sketch by my sister that I kept because it was so good.
4:20: "Smoke 'em if you got 'em," I say. I don't, so I don't. I'm also the only one here who gets the joke. My dog blinks.
5:00: Time to make the donuts.
5:05: I made the donuts.
5:10: Time to make the donuts.
5:15: I made the donuts.
5:16: Get amused by own joke. Remain amused for next five minutes.
5:21: Reread joke. It's not that funny.
6:03: David Bowie shows up on my doorstep again. I tell him I don't have time to listen to his latest song right now. I've got those projects to work on...
7:00: Time to start telecommuting work. Also, set up VCR to tape tonight's "Night of 1000 Laughs" on NBC, to watch when I need 1000 laughs.
8:00: Go to belly dancing class. On way back, discovered by agent who's looking for a "belly dancing type."
8:15: Begin new life as Hollywood mega-star.
Moral:
When all else fails, make it up.
Copyright 2003 by Alyce Wilson
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