May 7, 2004 - Showered with Gifts

So while we had told the bridesmaid who was holding the party that we'd be there at 11:30, we were there closer to noon. As it turned out, this was plenty of time to pitch in, considering the bride herself was not due until about 1, when her mom had arranged to bring her by, after making some excuse.

Despite the fact that I was once married, I had never been to a bridal shower before and I didn't really know what to expect. So as I do with everything else, I did a little online research. Through this, I found out the type of gifts that might be expected, which tend to be more personal gifts, things for her to use to pamper herself or to pursue one of her hobbies.

And so I bought a gift at Victoria's Secret. No, not what you think. It was a little vinyl travel bag filled with things she could use to pamper herself on her honeymoon: bronzing powder, lip gloss, lip balm, facial cleanser cloths, a nail kit.

My sister got her a really pretty glass vase, hence the roses.

As we bustled around trying to help get things ready, the guests filed in. At some point, it occurred to me that people were bringing in very big boxes, the type of boxes that were too big for personal items. They were household sized boxes. Kitchenware sized boxes. Luggage sized boxes!

Then it occurred to me that most of the women who were bringing those sort of gifts were from the older generation. And when I say older generation, I mean peers with her grandmother. Maybe, I thought, bridal shower gifts have changed over the years.

My suspicions were confirmed later in the day when the bride opened her gifts. Most of the gifts from the younger people were personal items like photo albums, moisturizers or knickknacks, whereas the gifts from the older generation were things like bakeware.

At this rate, she's going to be overwhelmed with kitchen stuff, considering she has two weddings planned: a Hindu wedding (for her groom's traditions) and a Catholic wedding (for hers).

The bride was suitably surprised when she came in the door. I joked with her later that she looked as if she thought we were going to jump up and beat her to death with sticks. I wondered if she felt a little out of place, considering that she was wearing a tank top and khaki capris and the rest of us were wearing festive summer dresses.

But I also think that maybe she's not big on surprises.

After the shock wore off, she made the rounds giving people hugs and thanking them for traveling all that way to celebrate. We dipped into the food everyone had brought: a nice selection of low-fat and vegetarian dishes, with plenty of vegetables. Very healthy fare.

I was quite proud with myself. After making the rounds of the table once and taking a small sample of everything I wanted to try, I threw out my plate and resisted any impulse to return.

When it came time for gift giving, the bridesmaid who was throwing the party had her 2-year-old son bring the gifts out. It was a cute idea in theory, but in practice nerve-wracking. This child had clearly not been walking for long, and he was more than a little wobbly. He would get loaded up with gifts, some of which were potentially fragile, and run across the room with them.

While he was carrying my bag for her, he tripped on the carpet and fell flat out, crushing the bag. I'm ashamed to admit my first thought was, "Thank God it's not breakable." But he didn't even cry and just bounced back up.

Everyone was complaining about the heat, and it's true there was no air conditioning in this country house, but I wasn't terribly bothered. As I told people, I live in Philadelphia close to the Delaware River, and we get a lot more humidity than you'll find in a Central Pennsylvania cowtown. The heat, therefore, felt less oppressive.

I talked to the bride's grandmother, next to whom I was sitting. I also talked to some of her future in-laws, who impressed me a great deal. We played a game where we were asked 10 questions about the bride and had to put down our best answer. The ones who got the most right won prizes. I ended up getting four right, better than I'd expected. But two of her future in-laws actually got 8.5 correct. The only person who did as good was her maid of honor.

She's truly marrying into the right family.

The only bad thing about the day was driving home. Between staying up late the night before, getting up early to make fruit salad, and the exhausting heat, I was really dragging on the way home. Several times I was sitting at a red light and actually drifted off for a few seconds, awakened by someone beeping behind me. Truly terrifying.

I considered pulling over and sleeping it off, but managed to pull it through. When I returned, I took a nice long nap and then went out with The Gryphon to the local Outback Steakhouse, or as one of the Comedysportz guys called it, "Australian for Sizzler."

More on my dad and sister's visit last weekend:

April 30, 2004 - Cruising with Murphy

May 3 - Stepping Out

May 4, 2004 - A Night at the Improv

Moral:
It's better to receive gifts than to be beaten with sticks.