Musings
an Online Journal of Sorts

By Alyce Wilson

Today marks a very happy milestone: The Gryphon and I have been together exactly one year.

Now, of course, I work weekday evenings, so we did most of our celebrating on Sunday. First, we went to a special exhibit on chocolate at the Academy of Natural Sciences, which was very informational and included a lot of interactive exhibits.

Naturally, at the very end of the display was a shop featuring all sorts of chocolate from around the world. We bought ourselves two different kinds of Swiss chocolate, which we intend to share tonight.

I have admit, the idea for going to the chocolate exhibit came from a couple we're friends with: The Cheshire Cat and The Paper. They visited the exhibit to celebrate their wedding anniversary. It sounded like a terrific idea. My first idea had been to visit Longwood Gardens, but that didn't appeal to The Gryphon as much. Since this was a day for both of us, it was best that we both enjoyed it.

After we had seen the chocolate display, we still had an hour or so before the museum would close. We checked out some other exhibits, some far less romantic than the chocolate display, such as jars of catfish preserved in formaldehyde, or a display or dead migratory birds, lying on plastic shelves.

I had some fun people-watching. In particular, I enjoyed watching this little family as they walked through the display of animals prepared by taxidermists and arranged in nature scenes. He was tsking over the fact that someone had shot those beautiful animals.

When he saw the buffalos, he said, "Do you imagine, there used to be hundreds of thousands of these? Do you know how much meat is on one of those? Mm-hmm."

When the father commented that one elk had a nice rack, the wife said, "Yes, he's got a nice hat-rack on," and giggled. "The moose has a nice hat-rack, too."

Their little boy was tucking his arms inside his oversized basketball jersey, dancing around. When they were ready to leave, the father called gently, "Come on, Boo. Let's go." The little boy skipped after them.

We visited the butterfly exhibit, which was fascinating. You enter through a set of heavy plastic curtains, designed to prevent butterflies from exiting. On the other side is a tropically warm room filled with plants and floating, flying butterflies. They bring them in as cocoons, I believe, and when they hatch they have free reign of the garden for their natural lives.

As we walked slowly around the path, we were met with new wonders everywhere we looked, marvelous, colorful, gentle, graceful butterflies. Some, the moths in particular, amused me by "hiding" on the brown walls.

When we left, we went through another heavy plastic curtain and a message on a mirror told us to examine ourselves for hitchhiking butterflies. For the rest of the day, I felt as if I had a butterfly hitchhiking on me.

The Gryphon wanted to view the dinosaur exhibit, so we viewed that one. In addition to the signs by each skeleton, we also got to see how scientists prepared fossilized dinosaur bones for display. A young woman was working on one in their workshop. In front of her was a large bone and a pile of fragments. She worked to fit those fragments together, like a massive jigsaw puzzle.

I asked her how they held the bones together once they figured out where they went. She held up a bottle: Paleo Bond. Naturally.

There was a little green-screen room where you could react to some filmed dinosaurs walking across the screen. After some families and other groups had finished and the room was empty, The Gryphon and I messed around. A man came in to tell us he'd enjoyed watching us.

I was getting very silly by this time. For example, there was a sign that asked how a dinosaur is like an elephant seal. I said, "Because they're both ugly." The Gryphon mockingly chastised me for my mean remark.

I corrected myself. "An elephant seal is less ugly than dead dinosaur bones."

The Gryphon was getting hungry, as was I, so we decided to get dinner at a classy Italian restaurant he knew about on Fairmount Avenue, Illuminare.

We caught a cab just outside the museum and told him where we were headed. But then we got caught up in traffic spilling out from people leaving a nearby street fair. I was truly glad I wasn't driving.

The cab driver dropped us off a short ways from the restaurant. Inside, it was beautifully decorated. They were playing jazz. You could also be seated on the terrace, which was where they seated everyone who came in after us. We were seated next to the door to the terrace, which was a little odd. Still, the food was terrific and the company stellar.

I had enough left of my delicious seafood pasta dish to box up for the next day. We looked at the dessert tray, and with chocolate on my mind, I got the chocolate peanut butter cake. The Gryphon got a bread pudding.

By the time we left the restaurant, it was still early, not even 7. We didn't want to go home yet, so we picked up a City Paper and looked at movie times. The Ritz at the Bourse was playing Zatôichi. This was a movie that we'd shown at Otakon, but both of us being staffers, we were too busy to attend.

We grabbed a cab to get back to my car and then drove over to the parking garage next to The Bourse, making it there with time to spare.

Zatôichi was an incredible movie by a master director, Takeshi Kitano, who also starred in the title role as a blind masseur who is a master swordsman. The movie combined elements of samurai movies with comedy and even musical elements. It might sound like a strange combination, but it was done so gracefully that the movie was a real feast for the eyes.

We made our way home then, and I gave The Gryphon my anniversary gift to him, which has been sitting on a shelf in my apartment ever since I got the idea several months ago. It was a sterling silver necklace with a gryphon pendant. He loved it and put it on right away.

As far as my gift, he tells me he's saving it for tonight and that it's more of a fun gift. Also as part of my gift, he gave me a beautiful carved bear at Otakon.

When we were falling asleep in each other's arms later, he told me he's had a very good year, one of his best yet. I had to agree. I thought about how easily we fell into each other and how right it still feels.

Despite my spotted history with love, I knew what sort of relationship I wanted: one like my Great Aunt Elsie and Great Uncle Paul. They were not just husband and wife but also great friends. When you visited them, they would finish each other's stories. They were so comfortable together and so clearly fond of each other.

But as good as the initial indications looked last year, I was hesitant to believe it. I spent months waiting for something bad to happen: for dark secrets to be revealed, to discover he wasn't what he seemed, or for initial attraction to fade into boredom. None of these things happened; instead, we grew stronger together. I began to believe.

It's not like we never disagree on anything. It's not like we never get in a bad mood or say the wrong thing. But we don't play emotional games with each other, and we talk out any problems we encounter before they have a chance to grow. Plus, our personalities blend well, and we make each other laugh.

I also have admired for a long time our friends The Cheshire Cat and The Paper. They clearly love each other a great deal, as well as having respect for each other. While they share a life together, they have remained individuals capable of maintaining separate interests.

The Gryphon and I, likewise, have different interests that sometimes intersect but sometimes don't. We have learned a lot from each other, been exposed to new things and new people. We've gained that richness without losing our personalities.

Some cultures believe you can never say whether you're happy until you gain a little distance on it, a little perspective. A year into our relationship, I think I have enough perspective to say that yes, I'm very happy indeed.

Copyright 2004 by Alyce Wilson

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